IDEAS: He alone, who owns the youth, gains the future?

Graham Stanton

Why share Jesus with children and young people?

One answer comes in this quotation from history: 'He alone, who owns the youth, gains the future'. Historically, it's an idea that has proved true – many of the movements that have had the most significant impact in our world have been able to harness the energy and commitment of the young. Often we hear church leaders talking about the 'strategic value' of children's and youth ministry – 'we're building the church of tomorrow!' And to a certain extent it's true: the National Church Life Survey has indicated that over 70% of Christians say they became Christian before 20 years of age¹, and the impact of growing up in a Christian home is certainly a significant contributor to this result.

But is strategy the best reason? After all, any ministry of sharing Jesus that has a plan and a goal can be described as 'strategic'. And perhaps we ought to be cautious of simply 'strategic' arguments, particularly if you remember who said 'He alone, who owns the youth, gains the future'. It was Adolf Hitler speaking in 1935, at the German National Party Convention. Human strategies can work but they can easily slide into manipulation for our own ends.
God's word gives us a better goal.

Psalm 78:3–4 describes the responsibility that falls on each generation of adults: 'things that we have heard and known, that our ancestors have told us. We will not hide them from their children; we will tell to the coming generation the glorious deeds of the LORD, and his might, and the wonders that he has done'. (ESV)

As parents and carers of children, our task together under God is to lead and serve them so that they might grow in faith. This means the way we live and the things we say, both formally and informally. As parents, carers, grandparents, godparents, youth leaders and children's leaders, concerned and involved adults, God looks upon us and charges us with the responsibility and privilege of handing on the faith and raising adult disciples of Jesus. As verse 6 of Psalm 78 says, they will be able to tell their children, so that the generation as yet unborn can tell their children. And in 2075, if the Lord has not yet returned, my daughter's granddaughter will have someone to tell her about Jesus.

The challenge though isn't that we, as parents, carers and church communities, would be all that our children need for their physical, emotional and spiritual development. The answer to their future doesn't lie with us – we who so often neglect the Lord's instructions and forget to respond with appropriate fear; we who continue the traits of the people of Israel described in Psalm 78:8 'a stubborn and rebellious generation, a generation whose heart was not steadfast, whose spirit was not faithful to God'.

So what will the answer be? It's no surprise that the answer comes from God – when again we show that we can't fix the mess we've got ourselves in, God in his kindness does for us what we cannot do for ourselves.

Psalm 78:70 tells us that when God's people couldn't help themselves, God sent them a leader who would take care of them – a shepherd to protect and guide them – and not just physically, but 'with integrity of heart' and effectively 'with skillful hands'.

We know that even David, the King who God chose, couldn't fulfil that responsibility.

We also know that his descendant, the Lord Jesus, will never fail.

This then is our task: not to be all that our children need, but to direct our children to the Lord who is all they need – to the Lord who gives them life, the Lord who will lead and guide them, the Lord who will energise them and grow their faith. It's not the one who owns the youth who gains the future; it's the God who controls the future who owns the youth, even as he owns his Church and the whole world.

As we start this journey together of joining God's plans to see our children grow in faith, here's the five-step plan:

Step 1: Find life in Christ: Know his promises, know his generosity and kindness, know his forgiveness, his command, the joy of serving him. Today is a great day to say 'yes' to Jesus.

Step 2: Share this life with the children and young people in your care. Each month Growing Faith will bring encouragement, advice, ideas and resources for our task.

Step 3: Be prepared to not get it right all the time. Despite our best efforts we will provoke our children to anger; before long we will show the same stubbornness and rebellious tendencies as the people of Israel.

Step 4: In light of Step 3, show our children and young people that we live by grace, rather than pretend that we don't need grace. Show them that you look to Jesus, and thereby encourage them to look to him as well.

And we do all these things so that by God's grace and in his timing we might come to Step 5 when, as Psalm 78:7 says, our children would 'set their hope in God, and not forget the works of God, but keep his commandments' and that they in turn, would tell their children 'the glorious deeds of the LORD, and his might, and the wonders that he has done'.

TIPS: 'Mum and Dad, teach us to pray!'

Bruce and Emma Maclennan

Our tip is to remember that kids can pray!

We started praying with our daughter when she was a baby. We learnt a simple family prayer that we would say aloud each night. It's easy to remember, helped by the fact that it rhymes. By the time she could talk, she could pray! This is our family prayer:

Dear Jesus. Please be with me from now until the end. Hold my hand and guide my feet and be my special friend. God bless Mummy and Daddy, Grandma and Grandpa, Gran and Pop and all my aunties and uncles and cousins and friends. And God bless (child's name). Amen.

We've tried to make time to pray with our children every day. Just before they go to bed is a favourite time for us. By asking the questions, 'What do you want to tell God?' and 'What can you say thank you to God for?', our daughter was able to pray her own prayers.

Even a child as young as two or three years old can pray. If your child can talk, she can pray!

TIPS: Watching what they watch

Kerrie Newmarch

When our children were teenagers, we made a real effort to watch television with them. I've noticed that parents are often vigilant in monitoring TV viewing for younger children, but we shouldn't assume that once they're teenagers they are able to discern what they're watching. From age 10 and up, children are making decisions about life based on all the information they're receiving, so watching what they watch is even more important than when they were younger.

The teenage soap-operas were hard to avoid and rather than just turn them off, we took the opportunity to have conversations with our kids about the storylines. These three questions are quite helpful in opening up a conversation in response to something that you've watched on TV together:

• Do you think that is true?
• Do you think everyone believes that is the right thing to do?
• What would you say to one of your friends if they were dealing with that situation?

Remember too that children are watching the ads as closely as the show itself. So rather than using the ads as the chance to duck off and do something different, keep watching and looking for the opportunity to talk together about the messages your kids are being bombarded with.

RESOURCES: 'Where the Wild Things Are'

Ruth Lukabyo

Have you ever wanted to bite someone? Have you ever wanted to destroy something, to smash it to pieces? Then you would love the film, Where the Wild Things Are!

You may remember the children's story by Maurice Sendak about Max, who gets in trouble for being a 'wild thing'. He then escapes into an imaginary 'land of the wild things' where he becomes the king. This story was a favourite of mine as a kid, so I read it to my kids when they were small. I think I loved it because it recognised the darker side of kids' imaginations as they deal with the fear and frustrations of living in our world.

The movie is true to the book at its heart, bringing alive Max's inner world as he deals with complex emotions. His response is to run, jump, smash, throw things, fight and rumble. Sometimes this expresses exuberant joy, sometimes sadness and frustration. There are also beautiful scenes where Max creates a safe place, an igloo in the snow, and later a tunnel underground, a place that can keep out the fear and loneliness.

The message of the movie is that the world is not a safe place; there is no king of the wild things who will protect you. There are times when no one listens, when you are picked on and when those you love let you down. Yet there is also a message of grace as Max behaves in a wild and rebellious way. And when he comes home to his mother, he is loved and forgiven.

I saw this movie with my three children who are eight, 10 and 12. My son (the youngest) really identified with Max's wild side. The older girls could not understand Max (maybe because he was a boy?); they thought he was 'just weird'.

This is a movie to see with your kids rather than on their own as the wild things in the movie are a little bit unpredictable and scary, and the themes are certainly deeper than your average Disney movie, evoking deep childhood emotions. I would recommend this movie to kids over eight (and especially boys!).

This movie may be a great opportunity to talk to your kids about their feelings. You could ask them questions like: 'Have there been times when you feel like no one's listening?' 'When you have been picked on by older kids?' 'When did you feel like smashing something (or someone) to pieces?' and 'What should we do as Christians in those situations?'

In our family, we talk about Jesus being our King and that he is making a safe place for us.

Where the Wild Things Are (2009), directed by Spike Jonze. Rated PG for mild violence, infrequent coarse language and scary scenes. View the Internet Movie Database parents' guide at http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0386117/parentalguide

Contributors

Graham and Kate Stanton live in Austinmer in the northern suburbs of Wollongong on the south coast of NSW. They have three children in primary school. Graham is the Executive Director of Youthworks Training and the Principal of Youthworks College.

Bruce and Emma Maclennan live in Pagewood in Sydney's eastern suburbs. They have two daughters, aged three and 9 months.

Graham and Kerrie Newmarch live in Condell Park in the south-western suburbs of Sydney. They have three young-adult children, twin sons and a daughter and son-in-law.

Alan and Ruth Lukabyo live in Dundas in the north-western suburbs of Sydney. They have three children aged eight, 10 and 12. Ruth teaches Church History, Evangelism and Apologetics at Youthworks College.

Footnote:

1. NCLS 2006. Survey conducted among Anglican churches in the Diocese of Sydney.